“You can’t reach for anything new if your hands are still full of yesterday’s junk.” Louise Smith
I am so done with looking back at things that happened or didn’t happen and regretting they didn’t play out differently.
The amazing idea I had that didn’t fall into place … Who cares? It is what it is.
All the work I was supposed to do last week, but couldn’t because of the wild Santa Ana wind storm … Oh, well.
The opportunity I let pass me by because I didn’t believe in myself enough … Could have, should have, but didn’t.
What’s the point in looking backward, when there are so many things you can actually impact and change in the moment you are experiencing right now?
Now, don’t get me wrong, I am all about learning from the past and the lessons that come our way. I know we are absolutely supposed to live and learn and that is something I continually work to do.
But, living and learning is extremely different from regretting what did or didn’t happen.
We are supposed to live and learn.
We are not supposed to look back and regret what did or didn’t happen.
Why?
Because (similar to a great Emerson quote) … Every minute we waste on regrets, we give up sixty seconds of focusing on what we can really do right now.
“Our future isn’t determined by anything that happened 20 years ago, 30 years ago, or even 10 minutes ago. It’s determined by who we are and what we think right here, right now, in this moment.” Marianne Williamson
And, that’s really what it is all about.
Did you go through a lot of stuff in the past? Yes.
Did you make some mistakes? Probably … who didn’t?
Has the last year been a bit of a whirlwind filled with ups and downs? Possibly. I know its been a wild one for me.
But, that’s life.
I am not discounting anything that has happened or that is still happening or saying that the things that happen to us don’t matter. Trust me, I get it that some real serious stuff can come our way.
However, everything that has happened to us has brought us to this exact moment and we are now prepared to take advantage of this moment in a way that we couldn’t have before.
We have been schooled. We have experienced a lot. We have lived and learned.
And, now it’s time to take advantage of the time, the day, the moment that is in front of us right now.
So, that’s the way I work and I hope, if you aren’t doing this already, you will seriously consider joining me.
We have amazing potential to do so much and really live life to the fullest. But, in order to do so, we need as much of our attention and focus as possible on the moment right in front of us. We can’t allow it to be tainted with regrets of things that did or didn’t happen.
We need to live this moment the way it was meant to be lived.
how?
Let go of any and all regrets.
Pour all of your attention and energy into what you are doing right now.
Reflect on your true potential and all you are really capable of as many times as you can remember.
Really experience and live the moment that is currently in front of you.
Take advantage of all the Possibilities of Today.
This is such an important life philiosophy, though is not the human condition we are used to in the present day. Its easy for me to forget to focus on the moment though when I do I notice how much more joy, peace, and fulfillment I experience. I have started to remind myself that the most important person, situation, and activity in my life is the one I am engaged with at the time. This has helped me recognize the present moment is all we have.
Thank you for this posting. I totally feel this right now. Life over the past year has been filled with more “downs” than “ups”…like a roller-coaster ride. And I hate roller-coasters…they make me nauseous. And during Thanksgiving, all I could bring myself to be thankful for was ….”This year is almost over”. HOWEVER…I am looking forward from this point on and not letting any of it get in my way.
Thanks for the comment Vicki. I think that is a great strategy you are going to follow. It really is just about focusing on what is in front of you right now and putting all your good energy into it. Thanks again for the comment:)
“Our future isn’t determined by anything that happened 20 years ago, 30 years ago, or even 10 minutes ago. It’s determined by who we are and what we think right here, right now, in this moment.” Marianne Williamson
really true Sibyl…… it touches my heart……
So glad you like it:) I think Marianne Williamson really hit a home run with that one:)
I discovered your web site about three months ago and it has helped me tremendously to take responsibility for my life and to make the changes I have struggled to make all my life. This post came at the right time when I was struggling with an issue I’ve been struggling with for over a year. I had received somewhat shocking news this last week, and I didn’t handle it as well as I aspire to handle upsetting news. But I handled it a million times better than I would have handled it a few weeks ago. I chose to waste a few hours focusing on my regrets and overworrying about why things hadn’t turned out the way I planned. But then I stopped that and I’ve let go of that regret. I chose to pick myself up and focus on the present and helping others and moving on. This last year has been tough but it has brought me here in my life where I see potential and hope and a life of possibility. I’m learning to take advantage of all the possibilities of today and I thank you, Sibyl, from the bottom of my heart that you have shared your experiences. It has helped me immensely.
Wow Jenn…thank you so much for that comment. It really meant so much to me and made me feel that the information I am sharing is really helping. Thank you so much for taking the time to share that story with me. I love how you integrated the information from the articles. I actually think what you said about choosing to waste a few hours focusing on regrets can also be helpful to the process. Sometimes you really do have to go through the process of worrying so you can put things into perspective. I think what you did was right on in terms of limiting the time you allowed yourself to do that. Thanks for sharing that wisdom here and thanks again for the comment. Let me know if there is ever anything I can do for you:)
> Pour all of your attention and energy into what you are doing right now.
That’s a perfect recipe for full engagement. A little focus is a powerful thing.
I think it’s easier to let go and focus on the moment, when we set aside times to reflect. Then we don’t have to second-guess ourselves as we go, but instead, know with confidence that we have a time to reflect, refocus, and change our course as needed, but for now, we are all in.
I think that is great advice J.D. I like the idea of setting aside time to reflect. Great suggestion. Thanks for sharing it here with all of us.
Hi Sibyl,
Live Today as if it were your last and live it moment by moment.
be good to yourself
David
I love that David. It’s a great MO to have:)
Experience the moment! I am so doing this, NOW. And I thank you for your blog. It helps me feel things in a different way, and I so needed that. The possiblity of TODAY and TODAY only makes life less over whelming and more joyful.
Thank You, Sybil
You are more than welcome Pam. Thank you for taking the time to comment and let me know you like the blog. It really means a lot:)
Interesting presumption. If you want to focus on today, let go of the past, and as well as the future. The present is what makes our world spin..
Hey Jaky. How have you been? So good to hear from you. Yes, I agree. It really is all about the present and whatever is happening in the moment right in front of you.
Hello Sibyl
How are you?
Regrets often shield us away from the possibilities of tomorrow.
I accept that things hurt us, make us feel bad, procrastination makes us want to go back in time …. but spending time worrying about negative events that have already occurred in the past doesn’t do us any favours.
In fact it does more harm than good. There are lessons to be learned, exposures to a variety of circumstances, experiences to be developed and an opportunity to retrace our steps.
Thanks for sharing this article.
Take care of yourself and enjoy the rest of the day
Hey Ayo: All is good here. How are you? You are so right that regrets often shield away the possibilities of tomorrow. I really love the way you put that:) Thanks so much for the comment and for dropping by.