“It’s not what you look at that matters, it’s what you see.” ~Henry David Thoreau
How are you feeling today? Do you have the right type of energy flowing right now?
So, I’ve got to tell you about a realization I finally had (better late than never … right?).
As I am sure you already know and probably have heard countless times … You get to choose your mood and the way you feel.
Of course, we all know that. That makes perfect sense and there is nothing really “earth shattering” about that.
But, what I finally realized is what that actually means.
It means that as we move through the day, we are supposed to continually and consciously make sure we choose the best mood.
And, even more importantly, if we notice that’s not the case, we are supposed to do things that will lift our mood.
We need to always have “auto-correct” on when it comes to our mood and how we feel.
That was a huge realization for me … not because it is an amazing insight or anything, but simply because I wasn’t doing it. I wasn’t moving through the day right. I wasn’t really thinking about my mood and and I certainly wasn’t correcting it when it went awry.
I would just react to whatever came my way and accept whatever mood it put me into.
If I had a lot to do … I would feel rushed and overwhelmed.
If there was something I needed to do, but didn’t want to do … I was annoyed.
If someone was rude … I would get irritated.
If something went wrong … I was disappointed.
My mood was literally affected by whatever happened … until I realized that I had the process reversed. I was actually supposed to choose to be in the best mood and it was supposed to positively affect whatever I was doing.
Dwelling on everything that is wrong with a situation … what we don’t like, and what bothers or annoys us is such an easy trap to fall into. For some reason, that’s always the stuff that seems to rise to the surface and it’s much easier to notice it.
But, that is also the stuff that throws our mood off. It’s the stuff that is “heavy” and it brings us down.
So, that’s why we always have to make sure we are looking at things from the right perspective and focusing on the right things.
Now, I am not oversimplifying things and saying to just be like “Polyanna” and ignore the “crap”. Let’s be honest, that is not always the easiest thing to do.
But, a lot of the time the “crap” is overshadowing the “good” because we are letting it.
As an example, I know this couple that went on vacation together. The guy told me they had a really good vacation. He said they had fun, some great down time and went to some amazing museums. The wife described the vacation just as “so-so”. She said the weather was terrible, the food was just mediocre and everything was overpriced.
It’s all about what you choose to focus on and our moods really are affected by whatever we decide.
TODAY (and every Today that follows), become conscious of your mood as much as you can and make it one of your top goals to be in a good mood.
how do you actually do it TODAY?
1. Build it into your day. Being in a good mood will not always happen automatically so you need to do things every single day to lift your mood. Start the morning off right and remind yourself that you are going to make it a great day and you will choose to focus on the right things. Put a “Post It Note” reminder on your mirror or send yourself a daily e-mail. Create a routine you can do every single morning to remind yourself to make it a great day. If you just do this one thing, you will instantly notice the difference. Try it TODAY.
2. Replace the words “got to”, “have to”, “need to”, “should” with “GET TO”. I came across this great suggestion that if you just swap these words, it helps you immediately change your perspective.
- You don’t “have to” go to work. –> You GET TO go to work because you have a job and are employed.
- You don’t “need to” cook dinner for your family –> You GET TO cook dinner for your family that is healthy and an important part of your life.
3. Lift your mood by reminding yourself of all the good that’s coming your way. Make sure you are really enjoying today and exactly where you are, but remind yourself from time to time about all the great things that are absolutely coming your way. It will make you happier to remember that your hard work is paying off and I can confirm for you TODAY that it absolutely is. Every positive thing you do nets a positive result (even if you don’t immediately see it). That’s just the way the process works.
Live Today Better than Yesterday.
What did you think of this post? We are all in this together so please share your thoughts and wisdom with us in the comment section. Also, if you liked it, please click “Like” and share it. If you have any questions or think there is anything I can help you with, please feel free to send me an e-mail (sibylchavis@gmail.com) or leave a comment below. I always love hearing from you.
Oh I LOVE this – GET to, not have to – AWESOME!!
Isn’t that great Tia…I can’t take credit for creating it, but it really is a good one. It immediately snaps you into the right perspective.
Great post!! Just what I needed to see today!!! Thanks!!
Yeah
So glad Monica. Thanks for dropping by and letting me know.
Hi Sibyl,
This was such an inspiring post! We get to choose our mood, and aren’t we lucky that we have that option. It feels similar to feeling gratitude, and living your life with the glass half full. It is easy to fall back into those bad habits of focusing on the negative, so your post is a great reminder!
You are so right Cathy that it is too easy to fall into a bad mood. I think it really is all about realizing you have a choice when it comes to your mood and continually making sure you are choosing the right one. Thanks so much for dropping by and taking the time to comment.
Sibyl,
I love that I “get to” comment on your wonderful post!
I love suggestion #2. I too came across it somewhere but until now forgot all about. Thank you for reminding me of this awesome little change that can work wonders on my mood.
I’m going to make a sticky note out of that and put on the wall in front of my desk.
Hey Angela: It really is such a great practice. It has worked wonders for me and if it works for me … it has to work for everyone:) So glad you liked the post and you are more than welcome for the reminder. Thanks for dropping by.
Just love the “get to” method. I’ve actually been thinking that way a lot lately. Have a dog that I get to train as if she were my own for the next couple of weeks. I get to do that and I’m having so much fun with it.
It lets me “get to” think about gratitude because there is so much of it in her big brown eyes. That is the kind of stuff I “get to” take from it and teach as a habit to people.
It’s such an awesome life.
Yet another great post. Mahalo
Thanks so much:) Doesn’t that little change just work so amazingly. I have really worked on integrating it into my thoughts and it just seems to work instantly. Thanks so much for dropping by and thanks for the comment.
Very spot on, Sibyl. I believe that happiness is a D.I.Y. project. We choose how we feel. Enjoyed reading this post. When I was very young, my Mom would always tell me to remember three good things whenever I felt sad/upset. As a child, it was very easy for me to do that. I mean, I’d think of a bun with lots of jam in it and that was a “good” thing. Happily, this became a habit – and now, I appreciate every little thing. That automatically lifts my mood. If I ever grumbled about something, Mom would quote, in a singing voice “I complained I had no shoes, until I met a man with…. what was that, Vidya?”. She had a knack of making everything sound like fun – life wasn’t easy and I admired that. Now I find that I do the same with my son
. We can when we believe we can!
Hey Vidya: I love that story … your mom sounds like an amazing person and a great role model. I was laughing when you described her singing and making her point in a fun way:) I love what you said about happiness being a DIY project … I just might have to use that one. It really is to true and soooo good:)
Great post, Sibyl! I loved it!
So often I read ideas for great living such as deciding what kind of day I’m going to have, and sometimes these ideas are shared without tips on how to make this happen.
It may seem obvious, and yet the truth is most of us learned to behave the way we do by repeating the behavior over and over again and those patterns of thinking are so ingrained in us we can’t simply discover a new way to think and that’s all we have to do.
We must replace behaviors and belief systems that don’t work with those that do and that takes more than awareness. You’ve identified 3 important steps to making positive change and these steps must be taken every day if we want to create change in our lives.
Thanks for sharing these 3 helpful steps! Have a grateful day!
Chrysta
Hey Chrysta: Thanks so much for that feedback. I totally know exactly what you are talking about because I used to read those things and think … yes, I need to do that, but how exactly do I make that happen. I really try to share the how-to(s) because I do think they are helpful. I am so glad you liked the ones I suggested. Thanks for dropping by:)
Amen! A good mood leads to good Karma; and then beautiful things do indeed come our way!
I have much appreciation for this post today Sibyl!
I read it yesterday, but actually applied…
“It will make you happier to remember that your hard work is paying off and I can confirm for you TODAY that it absolutely is. Every positive thing you do nets a positive result (even if you don’t immediately see it). That’s just the way the process works.”
…today.
I reached into the “Get to” *Grab Bag* and pulled out a better attitude to finish off moving out of a storage facility and into the utility shed that I assembled onto the 8 x 10 deck constructed by me. Good thing being the stagehand… that I am…knowing how to build, and how to properly move heavy items using fulcrum, leverage, and gravity. But, I still needed that *Grab Bag* for the last big push. So thank you Sibyl for the timely post.
Just think!
You *Get to* change a diaper!
I’ve been there Sibyl and remember it can be fun when the little one smiles back at ya…
Great post Sibyl! I especially like #2 “I get to…” I really try to do this in life.
Thanks so much Betsy. I appreciate you taking the time to drop by and comment. So glad you liked the post:) I really try to do #2 also:)
It’s amazing how we can immerse ourselves in all this wonderful personal development stuff every day and still forget to actually implement it in our lives.
I, too, love the “get to” re-phrase! I instantly thought of a half dozen statements that I can change and the emotions instantly change for the better.
Thanks for the reminders Sibyl!
You are so welcome Paige and so right. It is definitely one thing to know what to do and a far greater thing to actually do it and integrate the change into your days and how you live. Doesn’t that little tweak work wonders? I was so excited when I ready about it and then when I tried it and worked I was even more excited. Thanks so much for the comment.
Sibyl, it’s all about what we choose to focus on! I love that you gave up complaining for 40 days. Sounds like a very holy ritual. There’s a lot of biblical significance to “40 days.” I’ll bet it allowed for some amazing things into your life.
I love the “auto-correct” thing, too. I have to do that. I have also used a rubber band around my wrist. That helps, too. Snap it when you catch yourself.
Hey Bryan: I love that idea of the rubber band. I bet that works wonders … who on earth wants to get snapped throughout the day:) Thanks so much for dropping by and thanks for the comment.
I get to live cheerfully…..
That is really what it is all about:)
I’m getting e-mails, however they are in Spanish? Could you please send them in English..thanks!
Thanks Kristin for letting me know. That e-mail you received was an accident. I am updating my template and a sample was sent out to all subscribers. My most sincere apologies:)