“About 90% of the things in our life are right. Make sure you don’t overlook the 90% that is right because you are focusing on the 10% that isn’t.” Dale Carnegie
This is a great piece of advice that I am so taking to heart today (and every Today that follows). I am committing to not allowing anything overshadow the things that are working and going right. And, of course I want you to join me and make the same commitment.
Why?
Because we’ve got great things we are committed to doing and we don’t want anything unnecessarily weighing on us and holding us back. We know we want to live a fulfilled life, be happy and continually have great things flowing our way.
So, that means we’ve got to always make sure we are looking at everything from the right perspective. We can’t let the “negative committee” in our minds convince us to primarily focus on those things that are “heavy” and are perhaps not currently working out as we would like.
It’s not that we should brush over serious issues or pretend they don’t exist. We should do our best to find a resolution and deal with whatever it is that we don’t feel is working. However, we can’t allow “what’s not working” to be our dominant focus and overshadow everything else that is working. That will never get us to where we want to be.
Recognize What’s Already Working
You’ve already got so many things that are going well for you. If you don’t think so — then you probably should think about it again. There are things you have accomplished. There are good people in your life. There are things you are currently doing really well. And, there are absolutely even better things coming your way. Don’t overlook that reality or minimize what’s working.
If I didn’t know any better, I would believe our brains are hardwired to primarily focus on those things that aren’t working or the things that are currently weighing on our minds. Those things seem to quickly rise to the surface and can absolutely monopolize our attention.
But, the reality is that our brains are not hardwired wrong — we’ve just got to choose what we focus on and how we frame things in our minds. This takes intent and a commitment to not allow the wrong type of thoughts to continually run through our minds uncontrolled.
Today is the day to commit to controlling our thoughts and always have the best mindset possible.
The Possibility of Today
1. Create Your “What’s Working Today List”: Create a list that you can update everyday with the things that are working in your life today. Don’t overlook anything – the little things definitely count. Create a new list every single day so that you can assure that everything that is working will be at the forefront of your mind. This is easy to do and will only take you about 3 minutes. It’s amazing how doing something this simple just gets your mind instantly focused on the right things.
2. Take a “Time In” to focus on what’s working: If you start feeling discouraged or are in need of a “pick me up”, take a “Time In” for 60 seconds and reflect on all the things that are working today. Take 60 seconds to yourself and read your “What’s Working Today List” to get your mind focused on the right types of thoughts again.
3. Recognize that your mind plays games. Once you realize that your mind plays games and is always ready and willing to focus on “what’s not working” you will be less apt to fall into the trap. Catch yourself every time your “negative committee” starts acting up and reel it in.
Live Today Better than Yesterday
Did you like this post? Please share your thoughts in the comment section below. Also, if you have any questions or if there is anything else you need, please use the contact form or send me an e-mail at sibylchavis@gmail.com
Yes Sibyl, this has been reiterated time and time again, and I think it’s necessary to keep talking about it- what we focus on the longest becomes the strongest. The only challenge here is training the mind to focus only on the can-do part of our lives. It’s been said that what we have and don’t use, we eventually lose- and that includes our minds. From my experience, I believe it’s an healthy practice to be always pessimistic. Resourcefulness is a necessity. Someone advised to do what I can where I am with what I have.
Hey Giles: I think what you said is really important. You have to find the happiness and do the best with what you currently have at the moment you are currently experiencing. It has been my experience that the more I am able to focus on the moment in front of me and really appreciate it, I open myself up to experiencing things in the best way. I agree with you that you need to work on getting better and better at controlling your mind. I know this is something I am continually trying to do:) Thanks so much for the comment and for dropping by.
Doesn’t focusing on what’s right (aside from when your feeling down) lead to complacency and losing the drive to push forward?
Without the need for more out of life, where will the action come from?
Hey Alex: Thanks for the comment and for dropping by. I can see what you are saying, but I think the good old quote holds true — what you focus on expands. I have always found it to be the case that if I focus on the good and what’s working that encourages me to keep going and pushing forward. It’s a situation of the more the better. Does that make sense? Thanks again for dropping by:)
So many people forget to be positive about the good things in their lives. I love the idea of a “what’s working list”. And recognizing your own mind games. So true!!
What a wonderful post!
Thanks, Sibyl!
Thanks Betsy for the comment and taking the time to drop by. Isn’t it just too easy to fall into the trap and focus only on what’s not working? So glad you liked the idea of the list and watching the games your mind plays:) Thanks again for dropping by.
This Email came at the riught time. I had a health issue yesterday. The health isue ws only a 5% part of my life. Took a shower, refocused and by George today is great. I appreciate The Possibility of Today
Nice –:) Thanks Julie for that comment and for taking the time to share your story. I am so glad that this message came to you at the right time. Thanks for dropping by. Always appreciated.
This comment is going to be straight from the hip Sibyl…no quote…no poem…and definitely no negative committee here…just this
enforcer.
How about giving ourselves a break and listen to the honest positive committee of our family, friends, co-workers, and our love ones as a reflection of what is going right in our lives? How about *believing* once and for all about the positive traits others see about you instead of for just a few days?
The people that give negative enforcement…well you can silently say to them ‘piss off’ with a
on your face.
“Catch yourself every time your “negative committee” starts acting up and reel it in.”
How about more positive activities that are not centered on contemplation?
I bought my fishing license yesterday with the *intent* of a *Big Catch* to ‘reel’ in …………
l
l
l
v
You hit the nail on the head Rand. It really is about welcoming and focusing on the positive and catching yourself every time you notice you are falling into the trap of focusing too much on the negative and what’s not working. Thanks so much for the comment and thanks for dropping by. I really appreciate it.
Thank You again Sibyl
You are welcome Indran:) So glad you enjoyed the post. Thanks for the comment.
I once read that negative things are like velcro because we let them stick to us and good things are like Teflon because we let them slide right off of us. We just need to flip the two.
Great post Sibyl!
That’s one good example. Really appreciate it. One of the best way to flip the two is constantly filling the space by being in the state of appreciation of what is working. What say Paige?
Filing the space by being in the state of appreciation — I love that idea Jaky. Thanks for sharing it here:) Thanks for the comment and taking the time to stop by. I really appreciate it and always love hearing your thoughts.
Nice Paige — I love that analogy:) It really drives the point home. Thanks for dropping by and sharing your wisdom here. I really appreciate it.
This is so true. We tend to focus on the one thing that goes wrong rather than all the things that go right. I got hundreds of lovely and positive evaluations as a law professor over the years, but what do you think is the one evaluation I remember? The one I got in my first years of teaching that was very negative! Ha! So we really have to train ourselves to shift our focus to our successes, to all the things that didn’t go wrong. Great post.
So true Galen. Thanks so much for the comment and for sharing a real world example. It really is true that we have to choose what we keep top of mind. I am glad you dropped by and thanks for sharing your wisdom:)
Hi Sibyl,
I haven’t been here in ages. Glad to see you are doing so well with the blog. Love the What’s Working Today List. You are right that folks dwell on the 10% that isn’t working. I used to do that. Still occasionally because that’s what we are taught – to focus on so called weaknesses. In general, focus on my strengths.
What’s working today: My legs. just went on an Easter Hike. My mind. Coming up with all sorts of ideas for creativity group. My taste buds. had some yummy ice cream. My voice. About to work on new karaoke songs.
thanks! G.
Giulietta: So good to see you again. I totally need to drop by your blog again. You are right — we’ve been away for too long:) Thanks so much for dropping by again and leaving a comment. I really appreciate it and totally agree that it is easy to fall into the trap of focusing on the 10% that is wrong. So glad you had an amazing Easter hike:) Thanks again for dropping by.
“We can’t let the “negative committee” in our minds convince us to primarily focus on those things that are “heavy” and are perhaps not currently working out as we would like.”
It is pretty amazing how lost we can get, by focusing on the “wrong” things. Our mind does play games, as you say, and we need to be able to catch it and set it right.
So true Aileen:) It’s all about catching that negative committee. Thanks so much for dropping by and taking the time to comment. Always appreciated:)
Thank you for sharing such a beautiful message. I hope you have a very happy, healthy, and blessed day!
You are very welcome Lisa:) Thank you for taking the time to stop by and comment. I really appreciate it.
I love the What’s working for you list. I encourage my coaching clients to do this very thing but didn’t have a name for it. I let them purge their negative comments and then we talk about finding one small thing that was a positive in the same situation. Most often their response is “well i didn’t think about it that way”.
I love that exercise you do with your clients Wanda and I love even more when you can see those aha moments of – Well, I didn’t think about it that way:) Thanks so much for the comment and dropping by. I really appreciate it.
This is one of the most useful posts I have read in the last 6 months. It’s so simple, yet so profound.
What is working for me? Routine, Daily reflection, creating content, runs, daily martial arts practice, going to bed early, waking up early. It’s interesting to identify key behaviors that lead to the success of so many other behaviors.
So glad you liked the post Izzy. I think what you said is so key. Once you identify the right behaviors, they will lead you to more and more successful behaviors. It’s the best way to guarantee you’re always omving in the right direction:) Thanks again for the comment and for dropping by.