“Forgiveness does not change the past, but it does enlarge the future.” – Paul Boese
Recently, I came across a poll and 74% of the people polled said there was someone they still needed to forgive. Now it may seem that 74% is a high percentage of people, but honestly, I get it. Forgiving people is not always easy. I know I have had my own hangups with forgiveness and it’s definitely a situation of easier said than done.
People can really do some awful things and make it amazingly hard for you to even think about forgiving them. Especially those people that have somehow convinced themselves they have done nothing wrong. Isn’t it just the craziest thing that someone can do something they know deep down is wrong, but find a way to justify their actions enough that they aren’t even really apologetic?
Forgiving people can be challenging enough when people sincerely apologize, but it adds an entire new layer to the situation when you realize you aren’t going to even get an apology. But, as I am sure you already know, there really are so many reasons why we want to forgive anyone and everyone as soon as is absolutely possible.
Do It For Yourself
Forgiveness has always been one of those things that deep down I always knew I should do. But, honestly, once I discovered the direct link forgiveness had to my current and future happiness and also to my ability to accomplish goals and enlarge my future, I was extra motivated to do everything necessary to find the quickest road to forgiveness.
Could you say that a major motivation behind forgiving people was inspired by my self-interest in accomplishing what I wanted and prioritizing my own peace of mind?
Am I more interested in freeing myself to move on and create the life I want than I am in “punishing” whoever has done something wrong by remaining angry?
Absolutely. (And, by the way, I finally figured out that punishing people by remaining angry never works no matter how much the negative committee in our mind tries to convince us otherwise.)
So, I am now all about forgiving people as quickly as possible and getting back to focusing on the things I am doing and creating the future I really want. I am not going to allow any issues with anyone to handcuff me and hold me back. Nothing is worth it — and trust me, nothing is worth it for you either. We’ve got way too many good things at stake that we don’t want to tarnish with negativity.
Now, this doesn’t mean you let people treat you badly and walk all over you. I believe you’ve got to always choose very wisely who you spend your time with.
But, when it comes to forgiveness, today is the day to just let all the baggage go that weighs you down. I don’t care who it is or how terrible a thing they have done, it is time to get serious about forgiving them and moving on. We can’t afford to wait any longer. It’s time to free our minds once and for all and enlarge our future. Join me?
The Possibility of Today
1. Make It A Priority to Get Better and Better at Forgiving. Decide today that you are willing to do everything necessary to master the skill of forgiveness. This is one of those essential things that you need to be able to easily do. It will open you up to living in a completely new way.
2. Forgive, Forgive, Forgive. If someone upsets you and the negative committee in your mind starts winding up and recounting all the reasons you should be angry, decide you are going to reel it in. Remind yourself that it just isn’t worth it. Choose to move forward and refuse to stay in a holding pattern filled with anger.
3. Work At It Daily. If there is someone that you have yet to forgive, commit to clearing your mind of resentment or anger every single day. Work to see the person or situation in a better light (even if you are only pretending in the beginning). Eventually, if you genuinely work at it, your anger will melt away. Remind yourself there is always a reason for people’s behavior. Everyone has a story and something they have gone through. This doesn’t mean that people aren’t accountable for their bad behavior, but it does allow you to find a way to understand them better and forgive them a little easier.
Live Today Better than Yesterday
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